Learning To Express Myself
I like to walk around at night.
Feels right. Might be that dark is lighter
On my soul, despite my fighting
Eyes beholding shadows forming;
Warnings scold my peaceful roaming.
Delight advising cries inside me
Insightful lies to smite my whining.
Find it’s time to breathe in deeply.
Feel me melt into existence.
Below my feet, I ground resistance
Free by feeling what’s persistant;
Tears absolving time and distance.
Like water one spring
Decided to melt
Round the pores of my neck
And spilled electrical
ramifications round
soul-searching stares
over coffee and
tripping
fingers.
Moth-like commitments
burn themselves in our
radiant insecurities and our
god-damn experience smiles
from the shadows as we
keep rolling through the light
bulbs holding each
other.
I put down my book.
Feel like throwing my cup
At the phone that looks
Back not lighting up.
A kick to my guts,
My mind starts to spar
With logic so nuts
I forget who you are.
Monstrous the visions,
Your depths are so low.
But were her decisions
A real shock though?
Depression somehow
starts to motivate me
To accept that right now
I’m just scared possibly.
When you laugh with your eyes,
Right before you smile.
Breathtaking dark skies.
I’m lost in them awhile.
I found there my heart,
And forever will be
At home in the part
Of your soul I do see.
Riding our horses,
We pause in a clearing.
Both of us fearing
To grasp what we’ve done.
The Law, of course is
Constantly nearing.
Time’s disappearing,
Must stay on the run.
Air’s filled with panic,
So I take out a drink.
Take a swig, and I think
Of what is to come.
Juan is Hispanic
Manner’s soft as a mink,
and he chokes on the stink
of his taste of rum.
Juan’s true there’s no doubt.
For years rode with me
Brother in misery
Always had my back.
Then I take my gun out,
Aiming it carefully.
Juan has no time to see
my ruthless attack.
So Juan’s devotion
Was true to the end.
I did shoot my friend
So I might be free.
Filled with emotion,
I drink to pretend
Such actions defend
My own right to be.
I can see it in the dog’s eyes now;
a certain kind connection ‘tween old friends.
“What did she do now fella?
I didn’t mean to yell at her”……
Relay my heart intention so
that I may know such grim invention
Drank upon with beggar’s sorrow,
and lied about ‘mongst youth I know.
Stones tossed down chutes best gamble than reason
What combs best lay bees in
to make all eggs hatch.
Born of a walk amid minded matter,
kicked squarely thereafter
For making him scratch.
Thoughts ripped like concrete from bristled old wood;
I have found me again,
Intended for good.
akennific 